Avoid Poor First Impressions

By Jessie Nerkowski

Have you ever rushed to a particular seat in a restaurant with the best view of people? I certainly have.  Every time I go to dinner with my mom, we race to the better “people-watching” seat and when I win, she always says “you turkey.”  This little race may seem silly to you, but we are just “people watching.”  If you’ve never people watched, try observing strangers for a few seconds and form quick impressions of them.

Before I began writing this post, I performed a quick Google search for “making a first impression” and instantly Forbes returned Seven Seconds to Make a First Impression, 5 Ways to Make a Killer First Impression, and 5 Tips to Create a Positive First Impression.  By briefly skimming these articles, you’ll learn how to present yourself at a business party or networking event, as well as how to perfect your impressions in interviews, but you will not learn the importance of first impressions in your casual and daily life.

Why am I discussing “people watching” in a business communication blog post about first impressions?  The answer is simple: you never know who you will be in contact with at any moment.  Whether you are going grocery shopping on a Saturday or running errands before you head to the gym, you constantly create first impressions as you associate yourself with new people.  If your parents are like mine, they raised you on the cliché “don’t judge a book by its cover” to make sure you get to know people before you make rash judgments about them.  The truth is, however, you judge people within seconds of meeting them, and they do the same to you.  Below are three ways to help you always create a positive and meaningful first impression.

1.  Fake It Until You Make It

A simple smile is one of your greatest assets to making positive first impressions.  A smile not only makes you seem like a happy person, it also makes you more approachable to other people.  Think about your shopping experiences–what type of people do you approach for help?  Personally, I always try to avoid the scowling assistant because I prefer to avoid unhappy people.  Therefore, when you are having a bad day, try smiling and being positive. Just as smiling when public speaking can settle your nerves and also hide your anxiety about presenting, a smile changes your attitude by giving you confidence or avoiding negativity.  Ultimately, keep faking it until you make it because negative energy is just as contagious as laughter.

2.  Look Good, Feel Good

Remember a time when you put a little extra effort into your clothes and hair for the day.  How did you feel?  I feel great when I am confident about my appearance.  It seems crazy, but your appearance can greatly affect how you feel about yourself and how others perceive you.  I am not suggesting that you have to dress fancy every day, but always be put together and dress appropriately for the occasion.  Whether you are heading to the gym, meeting your friends for dinner, or watching your favorite sports team, your appearance should always be well-groomed, coordinated, and appropriate.

3.  Be Confident, Not Cocky

Confidence begins with good body language.  Just like you smile to feel good, stand tall and keep good posture to exude confidence.  To avoid appearing insecure, maintain open gestures and arms.  If you constantly cross your arms, you may come off as reserved and unapproachable. Similarly, when you directly interact with someone, remember to have open body gestures, look him/her in the eye, and give a firm handshake.  This initial handshake and eye contact creates an instant connection, and if you’ve ever received the “limp fish” hand, you know that’s not a positive impression.

Though you want to demonstrate confidence, you must avoid crossing the fine line to cockiness.  With my “people watching” experiences, I quickly labeled some people cocky based on their self-centered interactions with others and with me.  To avoid crossing that line, be humble.  Focus on the “you” and not the “I.”  Though people want to hear about you and your experiences, they don’t want you to brag.

To conclude, remember that everybody is “people watching,” and you are always being judged.  On any given day you can interact with someone important, and your first impression is a lasting impression.  Therefore, remember to smile, stand tall, and dress for success.